The day before boarding the train he read a story on yahoo of a tornado that hit
freight cars of a train passing through Nebraska. What he wanted to be thinking about was
meeting a random woman from an exotic place who was a brilliant conversationalist. You
know the type. Long black hair, eyes that write Bangkok Noir and the kind of lips that
make men leave other women.
A woman stepped into his view. She was tall with a caramel complexion and dark brown
eyes. She wore a faded slouchy orange dress, carried an orange snakeskin hobo bag, had an
orange and white pop art bangle on her wrist, muted orange wedges on her feet, neon orange
nail polish on her finger and toe nails and a tangerine beret that made him think of Kate
Middleton. She took his breath. His facial expression remained distant until her eyes met
his. A slow confident smile grew as she moved toward him. She took a seat across from him
and smiled as if she hoped she had found trouble. He smiled and said "I hate that
hat."
You've created a mysterious woman, I'm loving her snakeskin hobo bag and "eyes that write Bangkok Noir." The bit in quotes is brilliant.
ReplyDeleteHere's my attempt:
Story Opener
~Brenda
"...eyes that write Bangkok Noir." Damn that's a sexy line. Excellent descriptive of the woman.
ReplyDelete